Three years ago, to the day, on a cold dark afternoon I was rushed to a Bhopal hospital, an oxygen mask stuck to my face, gasping for breath. Covid had seized me nearly fatally. If I returned over three months later, more than half of it in the ICU, with a battered body and mind, it was largely due to the defiant and determined fight that my wife and children waged against it. It was a fight that drew the very best out of them and tried every sinew and vein of their corporal and emotional frame. I had survived but I had also become a different person.
Lessons from COVID
Three years is a good time to introspect on the lessons this near fatal episode has offered to me. What are these lessons?
I may perhaps begin by relating here the tragic account of the hapless mythical Greek Tithonus, who asked the gods for eternal life. To his utter joy, gods gladly granted this wish. But since he forgot to ask for eternal youth as well, he continues to wither away while notching more and more birthdays. Nothing brings out the stark difference between life and a healthy life.
Since considerable resources and time is still invested in pursuit of life, understanding how the remainder of life must be lived becomes salient. Obviously, we all will prefer wellness and to be free from infections and the resultant debilitations.
Life Span Vs. Health Span
One clear lesson that dawns upon me is to understand the difference between life span and health span. While we are obsessed with how long one is likely to live, one pays scant attention to how well or how healthily one is likely to live. Unfortunately, the present system of medicine and health care deals with the problem only after the problem has manifested itself unambiguously. There is little emphasis on efforts not to allow the problem to occur. The intervention begins when the disease has already taken hold and often when it is too late. The modern medicine is geared to prolong the life as much as it could but there is no room for improving the quality of health when one has already fallen victim to the disease. Modern medicine does not have a handle on when and how to treat the chronic diseases of ageing that will likely kill most of us.
In a brilliant book titled ‘Outlive’, the maverick Dr. Peter Attia talks about the common causes of death in human beings. He calls them the Four Horsemen (the four horsemen of medical apocalypse); heart disease, cancer, neurodegenerative disease, and type 2 diabetes and related metabolic dysfunction. Most people, if they don’t die of accidents and unanticipated catastrophe fall victim to one of these four Horsemen. The death is inevitable but the journey to this end could still be made as painless as possible if one chooses to embrace a certain discipline in life. As one crosses sixty, such discipline becomes a necessary condition though not a sufficient one.
What then should occupy our consideration, attention and effort is to understand the difference between a life span and a health span. Life span counts number of years lived; health span on the other hand, implies number of years lived without diseases and infirmities and often with a purpose. It is this choice of the ensuing journey that one must make at this stage of life.
If one were to plot the graph of our health and age where age is represented on X axis; and the state of health on Y axis, our lives should be a line, beginning high on the y-axis, then running parallel to x axis for a very long time and then suddenly dropping sharply to meet the x axis. That means that most of our lives we live very healthy lives and when the end comes, it should be short and swift; not a in a slowly tapering curve where for long years we suffer from diseases and pain. Ideally our lives must emulate this wonder curve.
The recipe then for a happy life as we negotiate the concluding part of our journey is to remain healthy. And remaining healthy means that you begin the repairs when the sun is still shining, not when the roof has begun to leak. A few things may help, adequate sleep, a proper diet, a minimum of physical activity whether by way of exercise or gardening or attending to household chores, communicating with people; and of course, seeking emotional nourishment. An attitude of involvement without expecting or seeking a return may be immensely helpful. It could be helping one’s grand children in their homework or teaching the poor kids of the locality, can offer immense emotional replenishment.
A Minimalistic Life
Another lesson that the past three years so eloquently offers is the merits of a minimalistic approach in life. In any case with the advancing age the needs of life begin to shrink, at least for many of us, if not all of us. Decades of acquisition that found little actual use must convince us of the sheer toll these unused possessions take on one’s energy, time, and resources. Lesser clothes, lesser gadgets, lesser ostentation do release the diminishing energy and time for more focussed and purposeful activities. It may seem like a personal predilection, but a dispassionate analysis brings out the value and wisdom of this approach.
Happiness Matters
Dr. Peter Attia recounts with passion a conversation with his therapist Esther Patel.” Isn’t it ironic that your entire professional life is predicated around trying to make people live longer”.She mused,” yet you’re putting no energy into being less miserable, into suffering less emotionally?”
She continued: “Why would you want to live longer if you’re so unhappy”.
A logic not only undeniable but profound enough to change one’s thinking on living longer.
Ever since my brush with Covid, my prayers have become far simpler and more straightforward.
अनायासेन मरणं
विनादैन्येन जीवनं ।
देहान्ते तव सानिध्यम्,
देहि मे परमेश्वर।
(Please grant me a painless departure and a life free of miseries. Give me your company when I reach you, O God!)
I can’t think of a more appropriate prayer at this stage of my life.
scribo ad LX 